I have absolutely no other idea on how to start this one. I know "the conditions" seems a bit strict but you know me and this wedding planning and preparations will be anything but strict. So let's move on.
The first thing you should know is that I hardly ever call the wheelchair "the wheelchair." Wheelchair is an ugly word. The one I use has a name. She is Lola. That's probably a pretty important thing to remember, I'd hate you to think I was riding on some showgirl's shoulders down the aisle. That would be awkward for everyone involved.
Okay then. I want Lola pretty much out of sight. No, I do not want to decorate her. I'd like her next to impossible to notice.
I do not want her in photos.
I do not want her running over my dress, which seems to be a bigger problem than the dancing.
I will not, under any circumstance, "dance" in Lola. That is not something that I find cute or charming or okay. I know some people do it but those people are probably not as in as much denial as I am, props to them.
It is taking everything I have not to just go to the courthouse and get hitched there.
Obivously, I have to sit during the ceremony. Dann will sit too. And so will the guests. However, how can I deter people from standing when the bride comes down the aisle? It's kind of awkward to have everyone standing for me for no reason. What do I do have a sign up saying "Welcome. Enjoy. Please don't stand."
And what about when we leave the ceremony? The way to the ceremony is easy. But leaving?
Sigh.
P.S. I am going to end every post with the following...
Of course I can just head to the J.P.
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